Plans

I don’t have time to write. I should be working on the mounds of homework I have while waiting for me just sitting here, but I can’t help get these thoughts out of my head. I wish to write on and on and make it pretty, but time just won’t allow.

I went to a wedding yesterday for one of my really close girl friends. It was a long trip to get there, about 400 miles out there, 400 miles back. It can really give a girl some time to think. There were many things so special about this wedding I could go on an on about, but one of the main things that was so special and evident was that God was the center of it all. While hearing the groom’s father speak about how they had been praying for a wife for their son and praying that she would perfectly compliment his son I got choked up.

This is what I want. This is what I have been wanting and have been praying for. But seeing it actually happen to another couple before my very own eyes has made it seem even more real that it can happen. Waiting for God’s best is worth it. Maybe this couple didn’t have to wait as long as I do. But that is okay. I want God’s best, why? Why not? I’d rather try and wait patiently and have God form His man for me than date the wrong one. I do not deserve to have a man who is wishy-washy about his love for me. I deserve to have a man who knows he wants me. I do not deserve someone subpar who isn’t sure of what he wants. Now it may take days, weeks, months, years till my husband is revealed to me…and who knows God may change my heart and I won’t ever get married…but what I do know is that God has an awesome plan for me. Whenever I doubt it all I have to do is look back on all the times I thought I was lost…..

Brother’s broken marriage brought me to psychology.

Uncertainness led me to Cal Baptist.

Cal Baptist led me to Hannah and Brittany.

Jeffrey brought me broken back to Jesus.

Cal Baptist led me home.

Home led me to a close family friend.

Family friend led me to discovering more things about myself.

Home led me to grow closer with Aurora and Janelle.

Dad’s sicknesses have led me to a appreciating him for who he is.

Psychology led me to Biola.

Biola led me to my best friend Brett.

Biola led me to solidify my major in psychology.

Biola led me to….well I could go on an on. (haha)

Broken friendships have led me to remembering Jesus is the only one we are to have our foundation in.

Singleness has led me to being able to be there for my family tremendously.

There has been several times I have felt lost…but then I look back and see God has done a great work in me and will continue to do a great work in me.

If I marry…I’m waiting for you hun. I’m trying to be patient. I’m trying to not look too hard. And when I do get lonely…just know, I’m praying for you too to be patient.